Acts of kindness. Simple phrase, yes? Putting it mildly, I sometimes wonder if the meaning, not the words, ever occurs to many in our present contemporary life. You know, as an inherent human consciousness that we know we all possess. It’s called, Empathy, Love and Morality. Those things seem to be lost concepts in today’s heavily politicized and divided world. From the span of evolution to present day, the human race has arrived to a point where our house pets possess more kindness and compassion than ourselves.

Don’t be misled; Acts of Kindness is different from The Act of Kindness. I’m not speaking of the acts specifically – the mindset is the focus here. Where does kindness come from? Are you a kind person?

There are no underlying agendas here. No religious spins or some kind of cathartic rants. My sole intent is in hope to wake the better angels in all of us. Why? Because it is an inherent component of the human species. An element that binds us, gives us worth, strive for greatness.

People with a kind nature about them don’t think about being kind. They ARE kind by their metaphysical existence and the nurturing from the individual worlds they come from. For some, being kind is a hard lesson to learn unless some revelation or traumatic event takes place that changes your perspective. One common example; criminals in prison finding God.

I once was one of those people. It took a disturbing event to learn something I didn’t know about myself. When I was born, my father was just out of the Navy in 1952. The big thing every summer was his whole family congregation attending– Grandpa’s famous “Bacon Roast”. Big huge slabs of bacon on spears frying. The bacon scent ran throughout the local park. At the time, the grills at the pavilions were large brick barbeque pits. You could cook a whole hog in them.

As the day wore on, just hot red coals smoldered in the fire pit. I saw an ant crawling on my arm. I swifted him off of me and he flew directly into the hot coals. The ant went totally nuts. Suddenly, I found myself gathering ants and throwing them to their deaths. I thought it was funny. It was entertainment. Enjoyment.

A few years later — I still remembered that. It bothered me that what I actually was doing was so superficial and selfish. Over the years, it became obvious as mean, vicious and maligned— evil act. How could I have been like that? I realized that the ants going nuts was not comedy. It was actually shear terror, intense pain and death. There was not one reason why I should have found killing ants entertaining. It didn’t occur to me at the time that it was cruel or insensitive or the fact of killing a life.

These days, I question where the humanity in people is? Are empathy, love and morality bad words? Are you terrified to show kindness? Well, it’s just a bug, right? Who cares? Don’t lose any sleep over it. I’m not losing sleep over the insects. I lose sleep over a society that thinks being mean and hurtful is a noble trait. Those who feel racism is cool. Castigate others for their own issues. Who think they are above everyone else. The insatiable appetite to make you look small so they appear bigger.

Of course, it really doesn’t work. It’s childish behavior. It doesn’t have to be like that either. Gaining respect through bullying people around is not respect. It’s just forcing people into submission against their will. Nobody wants to be compliant to bullies but, there are incidences where the pain of not complying is much worse than complying. Hopeless. It’s an awkward position to be placed in and poisons the environment with a sense of despair and darkness. Experiencing a life of hate from others is a life under extreme duress.

How did hate get into the conversation about kindness? Hate is the opposite of kindness. Let’s put it this way. Do you think hate and kindness can live together? Would it be logical to state for example, “He was the most kind and hateful person I ever knew”. For all intents and purposes, hate and kindness run in two different lanes of life. If you are genuinely kind to your fellow humans, chances are any hate you should happen to possess would not directed at others who are different than yourself.

The other aspect of this is, either they are totally void of kindness and empathy or that they use kindness as a tool for personal gain. Whether the kindness is genuine or with an attached agenda, good or bad – there is a need to receive something back.

Kindness of a sales person receives a sale for being kind even if they aren’t genuine. Others who express genuine kindness receive the pleasure of giving. No remuneration necessary. Charities and churches are a good example of that.

Then there are the ones who find kindness and empathy beneath their portfolio. It can come from an inflated sense of self worth, stature, self entitlement, narcissism or some other self adorning reason. Showing kindness or empathy would reveal you care about something good and may be perceived as weakness where strength is priority.

This is where the crossroad is. Those that can’t show kindness but know in their hearts it would be right, decide instead not to. For some reason it would be beneath them? Make them look weak to peers? Whatever the reason is, it’s not important. It just comes down to the lack of empathy. Being aware that everything is not about yourself. You are part of the eco-human experience. Your actions affect others whether you realize it or not.

Being kind to others inspire others to be kind to you and others. Why hate, discriminate, castigate, and bully people when kindness and empathy generates peace and harmony? Maybe you could try not hating others for not being you. Let’s light a candle of kindness. Make kindness a state of mind – not having to even think about it. Who knows, you may make new friends along the way.

I talk on this subject in light of our severely divided and polarized social climate. The country is in disarray. There is no end in sight to the fostering of hate and bigotry. A DOGE employee who claims, he was racist before racism became cool. When did it become cool to be a racist? The thought of racism being cool or acceptable turns my stomach. There is no place in this world for such narrow minded ideologies.

Yet, it gains steam and the fact that the U.S. government is all onboard with their superiority complex gives license to others to be hateful and hostile. Keep this in mind; what divides us brings us together. When strife and pain disrupts our lives, we reach out to others for calm and understanding. Kindness welcomes the desperate and the pained in an attempt to heal the victimized.

Kindness, empathy and morality seems to be a rare commodity these days. What happened? Why are people so angry, hurtful and mean – lashing out at people they don’t know and communities they disagree with? I have become more aware of others feelings and refrain from injecting negativity into relationships. It takes more courage to be kind than to be unkind.

Can people affect change in others to be kind and thoughtful? Maybe, maybe not. People change if they want to. Consider this; Have you ever been with a group of people amidst chatter and joking — one member finds something hilarious, laughing out loud. Chances are, you will begin laughing too because laughter is contagious — even infectious for some. The laughing itself tickles your funny bone. Showing kindness to others can have the same affect. Nothing special is requested of you. Just look around and see where you are. Understand people and the society we live in.

Here’s a suggestion— Start being more sensitive to others. Show some kindness and care for your fellow humans and they will show the same back to you. The Act of Kindness is a mindset, not just a generous act.

~ Jane Margo

copyright©2025 Jane Margo

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